It hurt a lot worse than I thought

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QuirkyCuriousBex's avatar
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I'm out of the situation I was in. It's a huge relief, but at the same time I feel guilty. The truth is, in order to do what I knew was best for myself I had to hurt someone else. Someone I deeply cared about, and still care about. I didn't want to. I hated having to do it. After it was over with and I told this person what I'd done, explaining that I'd had to do it for my own well-being, I burst into tears and cried until I was completely drained. I apologized to her, assured her that I never wanted to hurt her, that I loved her, and that I'd still be there for her, but she still felt back-stabbed. She and I are both going to be reeling from this for a good long while, and it's my sincerest hope that eventually we reconnect and can put it behind us. She has told me she understands my reasoning and that she still loves me, which I take as a good sign. One day at a time.  

I know all this is vague, and I'm sorry for that. Thing is, it's such a long and complicated story and I don't have the energy or time to go into it at the moment. I'll be moving again soon so I'm apartment hunting, and I currently don't have internet (I'm typing this on a public library computer), so my opportunities to post anything on dA, especially anything of substantial length, are few and far between.

I'm still here, guys. I know I'm super behind on replies and such. I'll catch up on those as soon as I'm able.     


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Kyo-Musouka's avatar
I see and hopefully in do time, that will happened for you both. Cause that is a good sign and if it's meant to be, it will happened for you both. So keep staying strong and keep your faith okay? :)